Help-I don't know what to do?

Over the winter of 2008/2009 I spent a ski season in Europe and I totally lost sight of who i really am. There was a lot of drink involved and on many occions I got very very drunk. I am not proud of what I have done and I slept with a fair few people. On one occion I went back with a boy who i hasten to add was a guest and slept with him. I have barely any recollection of this and woke up the next mornig embarred and left. Over the next few weeks it was revealed that one member of his party filmed us without my permssion and I was utterly mortified. Yet, stupidly I tossed these thoughts aside and carried on being reckless even ending up in bed with one guy whose friend took photos. I confronted him about these and he promised to delete them. It finally caught up with me 6 months later and the regret, remorse and self-hatred caught up with me and it bcame so bad I had to go to therapy, see a physchaitrist and eventually went on to anti-dpressants for anxiety. Whilst on these I got better and straightne myself out -had one blip- and then met my boyfriend. He knows nothing of my past. However, in the past month it has all caught up with me again. I have counted how many people I have slept with-11 and I hate myself, it makes me feel physysically sick. I am terrified that these images of me are on the internet, I stress so much that a viral e-mail of me will be sent around the world. I can't sleep properly, I cry all the time and literally want to die. I haven't been on anti-depressants for a year and don't want to go back on them but I can't see an alternative. I am also wondering if I should tell my boyfriend about my past or if I should leave it there in the past and try and move on.